Lately I’ve been melancholic...
I don’t know what brought me to this stage, but largely, I believe it is due to my single life. I’ve seen couples left and right, and that has made me think, “Why am I still unattached? Is there something wrong with me?” My friends tell me I’m picky, and some tells me I’m lacking confidence. Personally, I believe the air of self-confidence seems to be the biggest factor in my case.
Why do I think so?
I’ve not been in many relationships... I can count it with 2 fingers! Literally! But every time I fell for someone, it is always the same. I have this awful, possessiveness, and I try very hard to know what he does every day. I’ll message him every day, worry when he doesn’t reply me, and then my mind will start thinking too far. I don’t perceive that as a bad thing... it’s not as if I am trying to find out he has another guy out there. In fact, I don’t care if he does, as long as he stays true to our relationship. But my low self-esteem made me think I’m incapable of keeping a relationship, and that’s where the root of my problems lies.
I don’t know how I can rectify that flaw. It is just not something that I can brush off easily, although I’m trying very hard to not care. But by not caring made me think that I don’t seem to worry about my significant other. I can always pull the air of coolness, and say, “I don’t care if you got in an accident? I’ll just visit ya at the hospital later.” But that is not me. I care, and I try to show you that I do love him in my own ways. But when it seems so one-sided, it kinda hurts. But that’s always the problem isn’t it? There is always one who loves the other more.
If things are equal, then we won’t see all the arguments, dramas, and whatnot! It would be like a fairytale and we can say, “Happily ever after!”
But who am I kidding?
Anyway, to make me feel better, I went for a new haircut! Nothing is better than getting a new look, or the feel of new clothing on your own skin – yes, I’m a shopaholic, so sue me! But regardless, have a good day to all my faithful readers, and hope you guys are in better mood than I am!
The before!
13 Footstep(s):
Being clingy has its advantage and disadvantage... In your case its so much like my Ex..
Well, personally its all about the chemistry, you just have to find the right person to be with... A person who matches the way you act, the way you behave, the way you care, though everyone has a different way of caring...
And again, every human has flaws, it totally depends on how you both cope with each other... Until then, all the best to you...
Sometimes it hurts to be single, but most of the time you'll be hurt if you find out that you are with the wrong 'double'
sometimes i really hunger for a relationship....but i do prefer single now,freedom....^^
Ur new hairlook not bad...><
i oso hungry with relationship,
1 side sacrifice is really hurtful,
dun know when i can see him...
hmm, you'll bound to find your other half pretty soon...just grab the chance whenever you found him...until now, just enjoys your single life for as long as it lasts...
your new hairstyle looks awesome...
Hmm.. i thought ur current hairstyle is more stylish..??
hah.. yea, like what jeff said, enjoy as just you are happy with what you have now.. ^^
i cant believe you make yourself better by going for a haircut. maybe it's the same as me chewing a pencil when i am emo.
no matter how lowly you look at yourself, i believe each one of us has the good virtues and bad sides. and you keep looking at your flaws yet you did not realize that you have written down your good virtues right here.
you better get rid of low confidence and the 'what if', otherwise you are going no where haha. cheer up and stay strong like the mountain in the wind.
or maybe there is not many guys fit your criteria in vancouver. think of grabbing one from malaysia?
[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot
Jerry:
Believe me, I've thought of your side of the arguement! Unfortunately though, what's the chances of finding that right guy sometimes!? Haha but thanks a lot for the advice... And I especially love your last line! I can so see myself complain when I'm attached! xD
Wilson Wong:
Mmmm! I think i use to tell myself that a few years ago until recently! Probably I'm just dying for someone!
Joel,约珥:
Hey hey! First time I see ya here! Welcome! But yeah, I know what you mean there! You got my hand lifted to support ya! >.<
成亿:
Wahaha! Thanks! But gehhh! I'm not putting my hope on finding him anytime soon!
erictbk:
More stylish!? Haha I have to spend time everyday before I go out to make it... or else looks like shitz! Haha thanks though!
Ultraman Jino:
Haha! I didn't know you chew pencil! Carbon is poisonous though omgz!
But hmm... What's the strong point that I've written down!? I don't think I said anything good! But you know me! Always smiling and happy! Won't be showing my downside at least! But yeah! I'M NOT PICKY OKAY!? Well not REALLY! D:
wa,u so welcome me oh,so happy lol
I prefer the new hairstyle. Asymmetrical is cool.
Susahnya nak cari your blog.
wa.. so brave... big change...
gor, dont think too much K? your kaidai me also not attached la... single for so long ard... and i never have the chance to love someone... I never have the chance to learn... I totally have no experience with it...
Always thk... there are others who face this problem tougher then u...
your change is good ^^
trust me. when the time comes, you'll know how to trust him more. thus, you don't need to be that possessive. In the meantime, why not keep it cool? enjoy the romance when you are with someone you fell for.
gusto ko ung before na pic
just loosen up a little im like that when i was young and my bf felt he was suffocating,so i tried to be a little undemanding and unsufocating the next relationship
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